Staying Warm and Lubricated

I've been having a rough time lately so my friends have been making sure that I'm well fed and lubricated with enough booze to usher me into a state of serenity. I lost a bit of my appetite after swallowing a huge disappointment, so I have been eating only half of my food this past week. But that doesn't mean I'm surviving on fancy crackers and water. Max whipped up pumpkin risotto and boiled asparagus for me on Wednesday night. I contributed to the meal by buying radicchio, a lemon and a bottle of Moscato d'Asti. The shredded radicchio added a bit of color and bitterness to the thick, cheesy risotto, which benefited from the specially starchy rice that Max bought. After boiling the asparagus, Max quickly sauteed the crunchy stalks in freshly squeezed lemon juice. Though asparagus technically isn't in season, it provided a nice contrast in texture and flavor to the smooth glop of rice. Unfortunately, the wine was a mistake. I thought I was getting a bottle of Italian red instead of the sweet sparkling wine with which we washed down our meal. Usually served with fruit or cheese after a meal, Moscato d'Asti is also, from what I understand, what little kids are given at celebrations. Nonetheless, the sweetness of the Asti actually enhanced the flavor of the pumpkin.

In another effort to elevate my spirits, I continue to celebrate my Scorpio birthday through redeeming gift cards and rain checks for dinners. My sister gave me a gift card to REI. At first glance, I'm not the most outdoorsy person in the world. But I have been on my share of hikes in the woods. Never mind the fact that I sported dark skinny jeans with Puma kicks on some of these treks. I also took an orienteering class in college as part of the mandatory P.E. credit. (Those old-fashioned Southerners!) But REI is as foreign to me as an auto parts store. It's not surprising that I flocked to what I knew: the food section. I was amazed by how gourmet the camping food selection was. The freeze-dried food is perfect for singletons who don't know how to cook or like to wash dishes (I am guilty of the latter). All you have to do is tear open the package, pour in boiling water and fold over the top to let the dried bits soak up the liquid.

Even the plates were practical and pretty. I could envision this folding red plate holding some chips atop an Ikea table at a Gen Yer's pad.

Though I gave two thumbs up to REI's food section, I detracted major points for the women's clothing department. I would say that 99 percent of the clothes did not fit my size 2 ass. I was embarrassed to go scour in the girls' department. I was so frustrated that I even asked a male employee why the women's clothes were so big. He shrugged his shoulders. I did find this XS jacket in the women's department. It's too bad that the fake fur hood flopped over my face. I resembled a blinded Inuit. Eventually I found what I was looking for: black low-riding hiking pants that zip off at the knee to convert into shorts. Prana was the only vendor that had a pair in my size. I need to send the ceo a personal thank you card.

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